Looking back?

So, I know I haven't posted anything for like months, but I've been busy. And I still am. Btw, this post down here is really umm... late. It was typed like months ago. Just to let you know. I will try to get into the habit of blogging more. I will probs do so after August. I have a lot going on. A Peter Pan play, a Dance Concert, a Japanese Competition, a friend's b'day, a lot of homework due, a heap of tests and other things as well. Hoping you understand... Here we go. Nostalgia. I learnt exactly what that meant a few days ago. The day we just moved actually, in the car. Tessa told me. I always saw the word in books and stuff, but I just assumed that it meant depressed or something. Lol. So Tess told me it meant the longing of being in the past. Or at least something like that. Anyway, I realized that that was the feeling I felt just that morning before, the first morning I woke up at the new house. Funny, I always feel nostalgic in the morning. As I lay in bed, staring into space, I felt a wave of nostalgia wash over me. The longing to be back in my big, homey, comfy, familiar house in Malaysia, waking to the sound of my little brother watching Ben 10 on a Saturday. Then, the feeling of walking to the market (Pasar Pagi) with my family and buying all these yummy foods to eat for breakfast. Or even further back, having lunch at Po Po’s house before school. Ah Ai would cook me a simple but delicious meal like rice and steamed chicken drumstick. I even miss school! When I’d have to wake up at about 6am in the morning and put on my old school uniform. Yes, I miss a whole lot. But, I guess looking into the past won't really help me now, would it? Cos even if I do go back home to Malaysia, which I did, and I will, things will never be the same again. I might be able to go to Pasar Malam again and eat Malaysian food and see some of my friends and family, but I will always be apart. The year I lived in Australia makes a big diff. I've missed out a lot back in Malaysia. Not that I'm complaining about coming here, but I have to have some regrets, right? Life back home was so much less complicating and I didn't think and worry about stuff so much. Or maybe I've just grown up? Nah. But sometimes, you just can't help it, can you? Gotta stop looking back and start looking forward. Gotta make things less complicated and take life one day at a time. Gotta just let some things take care of themselves. Tommy Tim Tan